








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 513 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7776 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,368 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8408 | 46% |
| Smokes | 3045 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1553 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 5362 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,963,441 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1152 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dogwater | 57% | 51 |
| #2 | navE^ | 54% | 99 |
| #3 | Xela | 53% | 152 |
| #4 | ❖JvcobG | 53% | 40 |
| #5 | Scroncie | 52% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ❖JvcobG | 53% | 40 |
| #5 | Scroncie | 52% | 48 |
| #6 | Cocaina_Loco | 49% | 65 |
| #7 | nich | 43% | 89 |
| #8 | dexter | 41% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | navE^ | 14 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Xela | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | dexter | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Scroncie | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | nich | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xela | 520 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #2 | nich | 274 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | ❖JvcobG | 265 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #4 | dexter | 201 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | navE^ | 196 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❖JvcobG | +2.32 | 75 | 72 |
| #2 | navE^ | +1.77 | 74 | 56 |
| #3 | Scroncie | +1.09 | 68 | 65 |
| #4 | Xela | +0.80 | 83 | 71 |
| #5 | nich | +0.64 | 58 | 63 |





