








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 494 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 74 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1614 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,480 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1544 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1276 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1233 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1427 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $458,715 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 91 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ougii | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | pulujr™ | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Nasse3 | 65% | 37 |
| #4 | BRZR | 64% | 22 |
| #5 | d-_^ | 63% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Urbankills | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Nasse3 | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | ougii | 3 | 0.0143 |
| #4 | d-_^ | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | BRZR | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d-_^ | +3.96 | 96 | 66 |
| #2 | pulujr™ | +2.14 | 70 | 71 |
| #3 | Nasse3 | +1.97 | 81 | 59 |
| #4 | BRZR | +1.31 | 84 | 63 |
| #5 | Urbankills | +1.16 | 72 | 65 |





