








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 39 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 55 matches | ||
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4002 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,786 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4026 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2850 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3561 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2349 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $763,985 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 139 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Waldo004 | 65% | 48 |
| #2 | General Dynamics | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | CabbageGod | 56% | 166 |
| #4 | Ya Boi Jack | 55% | 60 |
| #5 | HerpAnnDerp | 53% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Waldo004 | 11 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | CabbageGod | 9 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Ya Boi Jack | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Hextar_ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | General Dynamics | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DTB Wingman | +5.36 | 76 | 70 |
| #2 | Waldo004 | +1.15 | 78 | 28 |
| #3 | CabbageGod | +0.23 | 74 | 54 |
| #4 | Ya Boi Jack | -3.03 | 28 | 23 |
| #5 | General Dynamics | -3.16 | 22 | 35 |





