








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1098 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 417 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




114 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6757 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,526 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4604 | 34% |
| Smokes | 5789 | 43% |
| HE Grenades | 2814 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 319 | 2% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,849,478 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 442 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thrisk | 51% | 51 |
| #2 | ShappaDap | 50% | 317 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thrisk | 51% | 51 |
| #2 | ShappaDap | 50% | 317 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShappaDap | 37 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | thrisk | 19 | 0.0176 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShappaDap | 439 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #2 | thrisk | 305 | 0.28 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thrisk | +2.17 | 72 | 40 |
| #2 | polio | -0.10 | 79 | 50 |
| #3 | ShappaDap | -0.10 | 62 | 49 |





