








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 819 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1624 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,752 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1642 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1606 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1685 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1819 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $675,278 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Samka | サムカ | 47% | 78 |
| #6 | aIbertito | 47% | 15 |
| #7 | MrCockLover | 40% | 15 |
| #8 | Pahamaineinen Pågen Gifflar | 39% | 54 |
| #9 | hARKIMO | 38% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hARKIMO | 11 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | Lihis | 10 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | ✧ 𝖘𝖜𝖆𝖌 | 7 | 0.0152 |
| #4 | aIbertito | 6 | 0.0191 |
| #5 | Pahamaineinen Pågen Gifflar | 4 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samka | サムカ | 230 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #2 | Lihis | 214 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | Pahamaineinen Pågen Gifflar | 150 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | ✧ 𝖘𝖜𝖆𝖌 | 90 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | aIbertito | 64 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aIbertito | +6.51 | 84 | 67 |
| #2 | MrCockLover | +4.13 | 79 | 66 |
| #3 | ✧ 𝖘𝖜𝖆𝖌 | +3.23 | 75 | 68 |
| #4 | Lihis | +1.20 | 88 | 73 |
| #5 | tompsuz | +1.19 | 74 | 63 |





