








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2514 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 430 matches | ||
| Premier | 271 matches | ||
| Faceit | 116 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




135 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
16581 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,658 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14457 | 32% |
| Smokes | 12152 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 10790 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 8259 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,936,980 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1257 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tater Thot | 67% | 82 |
| #2 | iwnl_cope | 63% | 81 |
| #3 | AviD | 55% | 74 |
| #4 | sfw | 55% | 274 |
| #5 | MAB | 52% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ces3lg | 67 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | St8ks | 26 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | AvHoCaDo | 11 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | Radio_static_9919 | 10 | 0.0078 |
| #5 | sfw | 8 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sfw | 964 | 0.17 | 21 min |
| #2 | ces3lg | 529 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| #3 | iwnl_cope | 274 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #4 | AviD | 251 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | St8ks | 236 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iwnl_cope | +3.43 | 86 | 67 |
| #2 | MAB | +2.12 | 88 | 42 |
| #3 | sfw | +2.07 | 68 | 56 |
| #4 | St8ks | +1.24 | 66 | 41 |
| #5 | Deku | +1.13 | 59 | 59 |





