








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 282 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 74 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3133 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,711 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2374 | 42% |
| Smokes | 1151 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 669 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1517 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,077,462 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | reni | 39% | 33 |
| #8 | Daizr | 39% | 67 |
| #9 | meowmeow | 37% | 284 |
| #10 | Broom | 35% | 74 |
| #11 | SEVYDUDE | 26% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meowmeow | 16 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | VRCHAT WHORE DM ME FOR INQUIRIES | 6 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | Broom | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Ekko | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Daizr | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meowmeow | 2287 | 0.41 | 47 min |
| #2 | Ekko | 542 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #3 | Broom | 297 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #4 | Daizr | 147 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Cry Baby | 42 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daizr | +5.09 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | SEVYDUDE | +2.27 | 78 | 55 |
| #3 | VRCHAT WHORE DM ME FOR INQUIRIES | +1.47 | 67 | 31 |
| #4 | Ekko | +1.44 | 76 | 60 |
| #5 | reni | -0.11 | 37 | 38 |





