










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 170 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 187 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2861 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,543 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2444 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2206 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1210 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1683 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,400,303 of utility $262 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 90 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Der_eine | 88% | 17 |
| #2 | Negacy | 66% | 56 |
| #3 | L0sER | 64% | 77 |
| #4 | Lorgst | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | Arangoal18 | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | L0sER | 64% | 77 |
| #4 | Lorgst | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | Arangoal18 | 44% | 41 |
| #6 | Lecker Fußsandwich | 40% | 73 |
| #7 | Rickohol | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Negacy | 13 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | L0sER | 11 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | Der_eine | 4 | 0.0121 |
| #4 | Lecker Fußsandwich | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L0sER | 373 | 0.24 | 10 min |
| #2 | Lecker Fußsandwich | 97 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Lorgst | 36 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Negacy | 25 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Arangoal18 | 24 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lorgst | +2.44 | 62 | 53 |
| #2 | revo | +2.26 | 80 | 59 |
| #3 | L0sER | +2.16 | 90 | 64 |
| #4 | Negacy | +1.22 | 58 | 38 |
| #5 | Rickohol | +0.93 | 74 | 48 |





