








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 100 matches | ||
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2075 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,699 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1754 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2095 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1850 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2000 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $670,237 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 75 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ruin | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | SwiFTy | 64% | 36 |
| #3 | wildpickle31 | 48% | 62 |
| #4 | A|B | 48% | 93 |
| #5 | Exactions | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | A|B | 48% | 93 |
| #5 | Exactions | 42% | 31 |
| #6 | don1 | 35% | 20 |
| #7 | YourBestFriend | 35% | 20 |
| #8 | BOT FrAg | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wildpickle31 | 6 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | A|B | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | YourBestFriend | 4 | 0.0095 |
| #4 | Exactions | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A|B | 880 | 0.46 | 25 min |
| #2 | SwiFTy | 148 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | wildpickle31 | 140 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | don1 | 97 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | Exactions | 86 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YourBestFriend | +3.25 | 70 | 61 |
| #2 | Ruin | +2.37 | 75 | 68 |
| #3 | Exactions | +1.46 | 79 | 68 |
| #4 | A|B | +0.72 | 33 | 86 |
| #5 | SwiFTy | -0.27 | 64 | 69 |





