








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1413 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 352 matches | ||
| Faceit | 179 matches | ||
| Wingman | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 26 different maps





Our logs show 187 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10141 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,616 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1829 | 13% |
| Smokes | 3555 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 6256 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 2976 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,438,843 of utility $284 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Q | 61% | 49 |
| #2 | Fab | 49% | 769 |
| #3 | Barrack_Obama | 47% | 59 |
| #4 | xXKuchenParkXx | 47% | 489 |
| #5 | jutt | 45% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Q | 61% | 49 |
| #2 | Fab | 49% | 769 |
| #3 | Barrack_Obama | 47% | 59 |
| #4 | xXKuchenParkXx | 47% | 489 |
| #5 | jutt | 45% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fab | 53 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | xXKuchenParkXx | 30 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | jutt | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Q | 5 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fab | 1031 | 0.07 | 28 min |
| #2 | xXKuchenParkXx | 413 | 0.04 | 9 min |
| #3 | jutt | 232 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #4 | Barrack_Obama | 120 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Q | 93 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Q | +5.01 | 88 | 55 |
| #2 | Major Francis Monogram | +2.26 | 65 | 48 |
| #3 | Barrack_Obama | +1.49 | 39 | 73 |
| #4 | Fab | -1.03 | 48 | 49 |
| #5 | jutt | -1.32 | 46 | 56 |





