








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 509 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 161 matches | ||
| Faceit | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4545 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,713 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2798 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2883 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1710 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2322 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $953,051 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 297 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | 菠萝包要拍扁了吃 | 56% | 25 |
| #10 | 认真操作每一秒 | 54% | 54 |
| #11 | mega | 53% | 60 |
| #12 | Crash | 53% | 17 |
| #13 | SICKOOOO | 40% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mega | 7 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Sp1Ke | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | KJunky | 5 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | SICKOOOO | 5 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | Havoc | 3 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slim Shady | 672 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #2 | ZhuA1 | 446 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #3 | KJunky | 297 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #4 | mega | 297 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #5 | Havoc | 253 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PureWhite | +4.09 | 90 | 64 |
| #2 | Crash | +3.44 | 71 | 27 |
| #3 | Havoc | +1.81 | 83 | 58 |
| #4 | 菠萝包要拍扁了吃 | +1.69 | 78 | 46 |
| #5 | Lil Havoc | +1.63 | 80 | 50 |





