








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 181 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 383 matches | ||
| Wingman | 171 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 85 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7325 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,221 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3645 | 16% |
| Smokes | 8099 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 5772 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 5705 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,596,238 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 508 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vengeance | 61% | 194 |
| #2 | HELLCAT OWNERMAN | 58% | 153 |
| #3 | Chimp_anZ | 53% | 91 |
| #4 | cope.REB!RTH | 52% | 421 |
| #5 | The American | 51% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | HELLCAT OWNERMAN | 58% | 153 |
| #3 | Chimp_anZ | 53% | 91 |
| #4 | cope.REB!RTH | 52% | 421 |
| #5 | The American | 51% | 141 |
| #6 | Avenger3611 | 48% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cope.REB!RTH | 11 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | The American | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | HELLCAT OWNERMAN | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Vengeance | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Chimp_anZ | 5 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HELLCAT OWNERMAN | 407 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | Vengeance | 397 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | Chimp_anZ | 397 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #4 | cope.REB!RTH | 328 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #5 | Avenger3611 | 228 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vengeance | +2.78 | 67 | 62 |
| #2 | Chimp_anZ | +1.95 | 84 | 62 |
| #3 | Kevborg | +1.43 | 63 | 60 |
| #4 | HELLCAT OWNERMAN | +0.50 | 58 | 57 |
| #5 | The American | -0.72 | 55 | 58 |





