








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 163 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1235 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,671 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 813 | 22% |
| Smokes | 832 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1175 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 851 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $584,979 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Yup | 52% | 44 |
| #6 | Aplari13 | 51% | 114 |
| #7 | meowskullslover2365 | 50% | 48 |
| #8 | Hugexy | 40% | 30 |
| #9 | Gerhard Rihmakallo | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meowskullslover2365 | 10 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | kundi | 7 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Jevvy | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Aplari13 | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Yup | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jevvy | 418 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | kundi | 244 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Yup | 210 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #4 | Aplari13 | 189 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | Hugexy | 127 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jevvy | +6.46 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | kundi | +1.24 | 67 | 57 |
| #3 | meowskullslover2365 | -1.15 | 56 | 46 |
| #4 | Aplari13 | -1.25 | 58 | 61 |
| #5 | bossgaming725 | -1.58 | 66 | 50 |





