








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
689 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,337 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 295 | 13% |
| Smokes | 959 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 386 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 697 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $68,590 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BurQeriino | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | lil_Hege | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Kassu | 2 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | wRg | 1 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Oh dog. | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BurQeriino | 104 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | lil_Hege | 104 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #3 | wRg | 87 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #4 | mude | 62 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kassu | 60 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wRg | +5.73 | 77 | 80 |
| #2 | mude | +1.64 | 71 | 84 |
| #3 | -卑劣な- | +1.07 | 77 | 57 |
| #4 | Smuu | +0.91 | 75 | 77 |
| #5 | BurQeriino | +0.86 | 33 | 65 |





