








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
920 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,122 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1245 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1385 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 500 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 992 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $188,179 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞ | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | Hack_a_Bot | 63% | 30 |
| #3 | Junior262133 | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐙𝐳 | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | ◕ヮ◕ | 44% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ✨♡𝚜𝚔𝚢⊹ | 43% | 14 |
| #7 | ✪ $paCe | 42% | 98 |
| #8 | HunterPARK![ms] | 38% | 16 |
| #9 | ai22sbro724 | 38% | 16 |
| #10 | botman | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◕ヮ◕ | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | ✪ $paCe | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | botman | 3 | 0.0085 |
| #4 | ai22sbro724 | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | ඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞඞ | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ $paCe | 272 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | ◕ヮ◕ | 176 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | ✨♡𝚜𝚔𝚢⊹ | 81 | 0.26 | 2 min |
| #4 | Hack_a_Bot | 62 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Junior262133 | 57 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HunterPARK![ms] | +3.55 | 64 | 51 |
| #2 | ✨♡𝚜𝚔𝚢⊹ | +2.85 | 58 | 66 |
| #3 | Junior262133 | +2.12 | 76 | 71 |
| #4 | botman | +0.70 | 54 | 62 |
| #5 | ✪ $paCe | +0.63 | 37 | 55 |





