








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 583 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




120 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5693 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 843 | 21% |
| Smokes | 455 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 1521 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1232 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,293,223 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1546 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | buggys big day | 47% | 357 |
| #10 | frot mom | 45% | 326 |
| #11 | Elizabeth | 42% | 53 |
| #12 | Ms.Pancakes | 40% | 89 |
| #13 | noclip iz 0.o | 36% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frot mom | 151 | 0.0250 |
| #2 | buggys big day | 38 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | ball | 22 | 0.0097 |
| #4 | noclip iz 0.o | 17 | 0.0134 |
| #5 | nyargh!! | 16 | 0.0183 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | buggys big day | 236 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #2 | frot mom | 211 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #3 | ball | 204 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | nyargh!! | 90 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | beanz | 67 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yves | +8.10 | 90 | 23 |
| #2 | jade | +5.47 | 55 | 38 |
| #3 | claire x3 | +4.40 | 50 | 44 |
| #4 | nyargh!! | +2.59 | 26 | 58 |
| #5 | ball | +1.58 | 54 | 42 |





