








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 841 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2109 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 975 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1093 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 410 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 396 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $387,348 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 693 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ol' Sprucey Boy | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | Durt Cobain | 62% | 60 |
| #3 | gent00 | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Balls McGooch | 57% | 21 |
| #5 | pl0x | 54% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Mexenhenced | 48% | 29 |
| #11 | Lone.Zatoichi | 46% | 28 |
| #12 | Jones | 46% | 85 |
| #13 | Volc | 42% | 135 |
| #14 | ☩MEPЛИO☩ | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gent00 | +2.77 | 66 | 49 |
| #2 | Mexenhenced | +1.94 | 62 | 53 |
| #3 | Franklin | +1.93 | 45 | 34 |
| #4 | Durt Cobain | +1.83 | 52 | 52 |
| #5 | Balls McGooch | +0.96 | 47 | 53 |





