








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 520 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 343 matches | ||
| Wingman | 153 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5442 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,796 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5035 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6350 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4766 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4645 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,399,718 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 424 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jestem.fajny.miszczu | 52% | 200 |
| #2 | Uczeń Kamil Zdun | 50% | 309 |
| #3 | Jaromek <3 | 50% | 136 |
| #4 | balukasik1 | 50% | 294 |
| #5 | JoJoReference | 48% | 189 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Jaromek <3 | 50% | 136 |
| #4 | balukasik1 | 50% | 294 |
| #5 | JoJoReference | 48% | 189 |
| #6 | N O I D E D | 47% | 129 |
| #7 | Dope Sensei | 43% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | balukasik1 | 22 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Uczeń Kamil Zdun | 9 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | jestem.fajny.miszczu | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Jaromek <3 | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | N O I D E D | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Uczeń Kamil Zdun | 1419 | 0.23 | 39 min |
| #2 | balukasik1 | 387 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #3 | Jaromek <3 | 325 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | jestem.fajny.miszczu | 324 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #5 | N O I D E D | 308 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | balukasik1 | +0.52 | 50 | 47 |
| #2 | CheesedToMeetYou | +0.37 | 68 | 62 |
| #3 | jestem.fajny.miszczu | -0.04 | 51 | 51 |
| #4 | Uczeń Kamil Zdun | -0.16 | 56 | 67 |
| #5 | JoJoReference | -0.27 | 80 | 29 |





