










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1004 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 261 matches | ||
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,341 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7497 | 35% |
| Smokes | 6333 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3667 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3844 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,084,374 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 957 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YellowHat | 72% | 43 |
| #2 | ioio | 69% | 246 |
| #3 | ✪DanGugly | 62% | 50 |
| #4 | ⌘ Morvo ⌘ | 62% | 34 |
| #5 | Jennifer Aniston | 58% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Jennifer Aniston | 58% | 50 |
| #6 | Alias | 56% | 32 |
| #7 | d1art | 53% | 32 |
| #8 | svs | 48% | 52 |
| #9 | JoGee | 39% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ioio | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Jennifer Aniston | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | ✪DanGugly | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | svs | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | JoGee | 2 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ioio | 818 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #2 | svs | 235 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #3 | ✪DanGugly | 232 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | Jennifer Aniston | 121 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | ⌘ Morvo ⌘ | 99 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CoJoMo | +6.04 | 74 | 67 |
| #2 | ioio | +1.86 | 75 | 57 |
| #3 | YellowHat | +0.86 | 69 | 35 |
| #4 | ✪DanGugly | +0.75 | 53 | 60 |
| #5 | Jennifer Aniston | -0.50 | 76 | 39 |





