








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 124 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 159 matches | ||
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3691 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,387 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3982 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3395 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2543 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3467 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $910,589 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 496 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | debris | 71% | 62 |
| #2 | Wooziful | 66% | 161 |
| #3 | Avoreon | 66% | 70 |
| #4 | thyka | 65% | 37 |
| #5 | rockyroad | 65% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Wooziful | 66% | 161 |
| #3 | Avoreon | 66% | 70 |
| #4 | thyka | 65% | 37 |
| #5 | rockyroad | 65% | 71 |
| #6 | CoJoMo | 62% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | debris | 21 | 0.0165 |
| #2 | Wooziful | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | rockyroad | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | CoJoMo | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | thyka | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wooziful | 817 | 0.24 | 20 min |
| #2 | Avoreon | 330 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | CoJoMo | 277 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #4 | debris | 245 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #5 | rockyroad | 190 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CoJoMo | +6.08 | 74 | 65 |
| #2 | Wooziful | +2.88 | 76 | 66 |
| #3 | Avoreon | +0.88 | 93 | 61 |
| #4 | ✪DanGugly | +0.75 | 58 | 60 |
| #5 | thyka | +0.73 | 68 | 58 |





