








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 94 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 185 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3334 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,420 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3817 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3212 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3208 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3183 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $766,176 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 318 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Taikaorava | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | Lapa | 48% | 52 |
| #3 | Aleksanteri | 48% | 96 |
| #4 | Tomdyyd | 47% | 199 |
| #5 | theb | 44% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | theb | 11 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Tomdyyd | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | LateLJ | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Aleksanteri | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Pipeman | 4 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tomdyyd | 1519 | 0.37 | 51 min |
| #2 | Aleksanteri | 477 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #3 | theb | 412 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #4 | Pipeman | 388 | 0.23 | 10 min |
| #5 | LateLJ | 279 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tomdyyd | +0.89 | 59 | 87 |
| #2 | mReed | +0.82 | 65 | 49 |
| #3 | Aleksanteri | +0.53 | 54 | 71 |
| #4 | Pipeman | +0.45 | 65 | 66 |
| #5 | LateLJ | +0.07 | 53 | 62 |





