








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1034 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,650 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 716 | 27% |
| Smokes | 549 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 804 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 581 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $180,029 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EAZY | 93% | 14 |
| #2 | dem0 | 88% | 24 |
| #3 | WEETL | 83% | 12 |
| #4 | NiToManato | 82% | 11 |
| #5 | nasse | 78% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | nasse | 78% | 18 |
| #6 | SolaN | 67% | 6 |
| #7 | kSwitch | 65% | 17 |
| #8 | riksen | 44% | 32 |
| #9 | Shero | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riksen | 6 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | WEETL | 1 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | NiToManato | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riksen | 210 | 0.32 | 6 min |
| #2 | nasse | 78 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #3 | dem0 | 74 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | kSwitch | 64 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | Shero | 43 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nasse | +3.30 | 84 | 67 |
| #2 | dem0 | +2.31 | 84 | 66 |
| #3 | NiToManato | +1.86 | 85 | 51 |
| #4 | EAZY | +1.64 | 87 | 60 |
| #5 | Shero | +0.86 | 86 | 69 |





