








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 375 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 2,195 | |
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2287 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,047 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1741 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2016 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1381 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1909 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $587,032 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nilson | 83% | 12 |
| #2 | zenna | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | Mysil | 68% | 38 |
| #4 | kSwitch | 68% | 57 |
| #5 | EAZY | 68% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | dem0 | 67% | 72 |
| #8 | nasse | 64% | 92 |
| #9 | NiToManato | 63% | 30 |
| #10 | ossY;* | 55% | 11 |
| #11 | Rednas | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dem0 | 320 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #2 | nasse | 308 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | kSwitch | 266 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | EAZY | 154 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Mysil | 145 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nilson | +4.41 | 94 | 69 |
| #2 | Rednas | +3.23 | 89 | 70 |
| #3 | zenna | +2.25 | 67 | 75 |
| #4 | dem0 | +2.03 | 83 | 74 |
| #5 | nasse | +1.68 | 81 | 75 |





