








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 520 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 39 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3533 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,241 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2254 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2794 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1314 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1879 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,175,689 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 450 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mehevyyden mestari (nahka) | 53% | 261 |
| #2 | Pensselisetä | 53% | 391 |
| #3 | Esco | 51% | 356 |
| #4 | mustasurma | 43% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mehevyyden mestari (nahka) | 53% | 261 |
| #2 | Pensselisetä | 53% | 391 |
| #3 | Esco | 51% | 356 |
| #4 | mustasurma | 43% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pensselisetä | 33 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Esco | 18 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | mehevyyden mestari (nahka) | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | mustasurma | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pensselisetä | 1936 | 0.24 | 50 min |
| #2 | Esco | 926 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #3 | mehevyyden mestari (nahka) | 685 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #4 | mustasurma | 162 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pensselisetä | +4.38 | 63 | 61 |
| #2 | mehevyyden mestari (nahka) | +0.37 | 51 | 57 |
| #3 | toby. | -0.89 | 46 | 45 |
| #4 | Esco | -1.58 | 30 | 67 |
| #5 | mustasurma | -2.82 | 23 | 43 |





