








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2231 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 354 matches | ||
| Esplay | 153 matches | 2,191 | |
| Faceit | 147 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7690 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,905 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8857 | 24% |
| Smokes | 9794 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8521 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 9733 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,127,587 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1037 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cursed | 59% | 316 |
| #2 | 5000 rating destroyer | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | TheBaldRat | 59% | 51 |
| #4 | GREG MORO | 57% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cursed | 59% | 316 |
| #2 | 5000 rating destroyer | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | TheBaldRat | 59% | 51 |
| #4 | GREG MORO | 57% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cursed | 15 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | 5000 rating destroyer | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cursed | 1578 | 0.24 | 33 min |
| #2 | 5000 rating destroyer | 387 | 0.27 | 10 min |
| #3 | GREG MORO | 138 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | TheBaldRat | 87 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKYTRiXSHA | +1.35 | 75 | 64 |
| #2 | GREG MORO | +0.82 | 86 | 61 |
| #3 | 5000 rating destroyer | +0.67 | 87 | 59 |
| #4 | TheBaldRat | +0.46 | 68 | 61 |
| #5 | Cursed | -0.03 | 68 | 62 |





