








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 226 matches | ||
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2650 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,676 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1613 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1256 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1793 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2014 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $715,980 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z.yroS | 33 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | eren | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | 脅威 | 6 | 0.0179 |
| #4 | MrK | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | IRVDK | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eren | 307 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | Z.yroS | 169 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #3 | MrK | 92 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Aureus | 35 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | 脅威 | 28 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Il formaggio | +1.29 | 73 | 53 |
| #2 | eren | +0.94 | 73 | 67 |
| #3 | MrK | +0.91 | 64 | 56 |
| #4 | IRVDK | -0.53 | 47 | 36 |
| #5 | Z.yroS | -0.56 | 54 | 40 |





