








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 136 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 1,951 | |
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
919 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,045 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 929 | 31% |
| Smokes | 680 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 788 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 648 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $472,106 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 46 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Sandis | 61% | 98 |
| #7 | inconsistency | 59% | 17 |
| #8 | Fefflan | 53% | 17 |
| #9 | Fridde | 51% | 47 |
| #10 | ExponentNote348 | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandis | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | screm | 5 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Jacke | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | Fridde | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandis | 357 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #2 | Fridde | 105 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | screm | 101 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | ExponentNote348 | 68 | 0.38 | 2 min |
| #5 | Fefflan | 56 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandis | +3.63 | 88 | 57 |
| #2 | Jacke | +1.71 | 85 | 55 |
| #3 | screm | +1.17 | 77 | 61 |
| #4 | index | +0.99 | 80 | 67 |
| #5 | Katt | +0.82 | 64 | 66 |





