








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 516 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 97 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2973 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,505 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6236 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5825 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2875 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 4569 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,105,481 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 166 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Ranger7700DK#likeAshadow | 50% | 128 |
| #5 | thyge | 48% | 189 |
| #6 | Ninuz | 48% | 113 |
| #7 | BomberDK | 48% | 214 |
| #8 | sebastian | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BomberDK | 17 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | thyge | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Ninuz | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Ninuz | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Tjepper | 3 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BomberDK | 582 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #2 | Ninuz | 253 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ninuz | 150 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | thyge | 107 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ranger7700DK#likeAshadow | 88 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FrederikZen | +1.00 | 37 | 66 |
| #2 | Tjepper | +0.16 | 28 | 66 |
| #3 | BomberDK | +0.11 | 49 | 60 |
| #4 | Ninuz | +0.03 | 47 | 63 |
| #5 | Ranger7700DK#likeAshadow | -0.54 | 29 | 59 |





