








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 857 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 458 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




61 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7166 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,369 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10407 | 32% |
| Smokes | 8185 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6874 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6903 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,977,322 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 222 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★ Mr. UMnu uhambe | 64% | 47 |
| #2 | Gandalf Biceps | 56% | 73 |
| #3 | Nikodem | 53% | 43 |
| #4 | Miqel | 52% | 42 |
| #5 | Mufmentlol | 51% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mufmentlol | +2.00 | 63 | 67 |
| #2 | ★ Mr. UMnu uhambe | +1.67 | 68 | 55 |
| #3 | FreAkyFreAx | +1.54 | 71 | 81 |
| #4 | Ugandalf | +0.15 | 54 | 60 |
| #5 | Miqel | -0.45 | 56 | 69 |





