










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 809 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3689 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,970 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1069 | 12% |
| Smokes | 2554 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3462 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1885 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,889,912 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1177 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TimesNewRoman | 61% | 54 |
| #2 | チェリー Masuo Miyaya 🍒 | 58% | 43 |
| #3 | Hymel Jadwiga | 56% | 57 |
| #4 | ★ Mr. UMnu uhambe | 53% | 43 |
| #5 | FreAkyFreAx | 53% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | grand theft autism | 46% | 50 |
| #12 | Mufmentlol | 45% | 124 |
| #13 | meniometa | 44% | 340 |
| #14 | Prince The Ratlord [Książę] | 44% | 48 |
| #15 | RybciaEmilcia | 39% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mufmentlol | 602 | 0.25 | 15 min |
| #2 | Ugandalf | 328 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | FreAkyFreAx | 250 | 0.29 | 7 min |
| #4 | Gandalf Biceps | 204 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | チェリー Masuo Miyaya 🍒 | 203 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | チェリー Masuo Miyaya 🍒 | +7.60 | 87 | 82 |
| #2 | FreAkyFreAx | +5.38 | 77 | 80 |
| #3 | Ugandalf | +3.99 | 63 | 63 |
| #4 | ★ Mr. UMnu uhambe | +3.85 | 69 | 33 |
| #5 | Mufmentlol | +2.10 | 66 | 66 |





