










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
220 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 343 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 151 | 44% |
| Smokes | 3 | 1% |
| HE Grenades | 109 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 80 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $86,932 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SweatyMcPitstains | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | Llywelyn Fawr | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | beasthunter9923 | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | Oranjô | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | damp socks | 58% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | beasthunter9923 | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | Oranjô | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | damp socks | 58% | 12 |
| #6 | anchovybrian4 | 57% | 7 |
| #7 | gear brylls | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | anchovybrian4 | 1 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | Oranjô | 1 | 0.0080 |
| #3 | Llywelyn Fawr | 1 | 0.0084 |
| #4 | SweatyMcPitstains | 1 | 0.0123 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Llywelyn Fawr | 38 | 0.32 | 1 min |
| #2 | beasthunter9923 | 20 | 0.37 | 1 min |
| #3 | damp socks | 13 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | SweatyMcPitstains | 13 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #5 | gear brylls | 12 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Llywelyn Fawr | +7.17 | 72 | 38 |
| #2 | Tecwyn | +5.35 | 84 | 54 |
| #3 | beasthunter9923 | +1.73 | 50 | 45 |
| #4 | Oranjô | +1.05 | 34 | 45 |
| #5 | SweatyMcPitstains | +0.29 | 45 | 57 |





