








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 208 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 70 matches | ||
| Wingman | 65 matches | ||
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,295 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 909 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1216 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1134 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1036 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $759,862 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KC★ | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | fra6z | 55% | 62 |
| #3 | Zapman | 53% | 57 |
| #4 | Ѱ zonymonst9rSON Ѱ | 48% | 85 |
| #5 | pvier | 46% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | kAKTUS# | 46% | 46 |
| #7 | Luvar | 45% | 69 |
| #8 | M1ka | 44% | 32 |
| #9 | timz | 43% | 14 |
| #10 | Niico | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kAKTUS# | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | pvier | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Ѱ zonymonst9rSON Ѱ | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Luvar | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | fra6z | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pvier | 300 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | Ѱ zonymonst9rSON Ѱ | 270 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | fra6z | 255 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #4 | M1ka | 235 | 0.32 | 6 min |
| #5 | Luvar | 199 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1ka | +2.97 | 79 | 70 |
| #2 | timz | +1.71 | 76 | 66 |
| #3 | pvier | +1.48 | 88 | 63 |
| #4 | fra6z | +1.42 | 58 | 63 |
| #5 | Zapman | +0.27 | 69 | 39 |





