








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1377 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,004 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2508 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1984 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1010 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1502 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $343,710 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eugeo | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | Lemone | 61% | 23 |
| #3 | Mariolin | 54% | 41 |
| #4 | Sul1 | 51% | 37 |
| #5 | R A Y N O -iwnl- | 51% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | R A Y N O -iwnl- | 51% | 39 |
| #6 | ☂Nagelbrett☂ | 50% | 8 |
| #7 | Alex Deli | 50% | 28 |
| #8 | GungiGangu | 46% | 39 |
| #9 | ♞︎ huskyta | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eugeo | 7 | 0.0405 |
| #2 | Mariolin | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Sul1 | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | R A Y N O -iwnl- | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Alex Deli | 3 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R A Y N O -iwnl- | 167 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #2 | GungiGangu | 131 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | Mariolin | 122 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | Alex Deli | 70 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Sul1 | 69 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemone | +3.33 | 81 | 51 |
| #2 | Alex Deli | +2.49 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | R A Y N O -iwnl- | +0.84 | 89 | 69 |
| #4 | KeyRox | +0.78 | 81 | 71 |
| #5 | Mariolin | +0.64 | 61 | 64 |





