








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 31 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 78 matches | ||
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2247 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,631 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2210 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3022 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2318 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2081 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $318,535 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 105 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SnowT | 65% | 62 |
| #2 | j1v | 59% | 79 |
| #3 | Endive | 59% | 74 |
| #4 | Steve | 58% | 19 |
| #5 | LOVE SOMALIA | 50% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Endive | 59% | 74 |
| #4 | Steve | 58% | 19 |
| #5 | LOVE SOMALIA | 50% | 26 |
| #6 | Izet Nanic | 48% | 21 |
| #7 | khaled | 45% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j1v | 15 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | Endive | 15 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | SnowT | 8 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | khaled | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | LOVE SOMALIA | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j1v | 449 | 0.28 | 9 min |
| #2 | LOVE SOMALIA | 111 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | SnowT | 100 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | Endive | 93 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | khaled | 91 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j1v | +2.73 | 76 | 58 |
| #2 | tarik | +1.57 | 80 | 73 |
| #3 | SnowT | +0.53 | 77 | 61 |
| #4 | Endive | +0.25 | 76 | 61 |
| #5 | Izet Nanic | -0.21 | 53 | 55 |





