








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1231 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 141 matches | ||
| Premier | 115 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3400 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,250 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2936 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2648 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3121 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2545 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $852,039 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 446 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TC PabloABI | 56% | 223 |
| #2 | X | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | JOOMGOOM | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | mAR1o | 51% | 47 |
| #5 | Don Jolov1 | 49% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | X | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | JOOMGOOM | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | mAR1o | 51% | 47 |
| #5 | Don Jolov1 | 49% | 61 |
| #6 | TC AKAserG | 48% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TC PabloABI | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | X | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | TC AKAserG | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | mAR1o | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Don Jolov1 | 3 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TC PabloABI | 635 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #2 | mAR1o | 162 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | Don Jolov1 | 146 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | X | 114 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | TC AKAserG | 100 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KoKa | +2.77 | 88 | 59 |
| #2 | TC PabloABI | +1.72 | 85 | 64 |
| #3 | mAR1o | +1.11 | 78 | 62 |
| #4 | X | -0.43 | 71 | 49 |
| #5 | TC AKAserG | -1.59 | 61 | 59 |





