








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 377 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1046 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,720 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 985 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1073 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 614 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1048 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $610,282 of utility $215 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 204 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOOMGOOM | 60% | 40 |
| #2 | KoKa | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | TC AKAserG | 49% | 45 |
| #4 | TC PabloABI | 47% | 81 |
| #5 | Don Jolov1 | 43% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOOMGOOM | 60% | 40 |
| #2 | KoKa | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | TC AKAserG | 49% | 45 |
| #4 | TC PabloABI | 47% | 81 |
| #5 | Don Jolov1 | 43% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TC PabloABI | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | KoKa | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | TC AKAserG | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Don Jolov1 | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | JOOMGOOM | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TC PabloABI | 288 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #2 | KoKa | 216 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | Don Jolov1 | 215 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | TC AKAserG | 76 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | JOOMGOOM | 55 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TC PabloABI | +3.10 | 81 | 68 |
| #2 | KoKa | +2.94 | 91 | 70 |
| #3 | X | -0.42 | 67 | 51 |
| #4 | TC AKAserG | -0.54 | 66 | 62 |
| #5 | JOOMGOOM | -0.94 | 52 | 59 |





