








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 914 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 781 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8453 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,415 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10073 | 27% |
| Smokes | 11879 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 8964 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6499 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,776,980 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 687 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | danyooh | 58% | 50 |
| #2 | KuTenis | 56% | 50 |
| #3 | aNxi. | 52% | 188 |
| #4 | vanityyy | 51% | 135 |
| #5 | Mcdonald Glover | 49% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanityyy | 28 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | dirvonas | 13 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Gaishena | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | donk | 7 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | danyooh | 5 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aNxi. | 363 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #2 | vanityyy | 318 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #3 | Gaishena | 250 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | dirvonas | 237 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | Mcdonald Glover | 180 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanityyy | +3.20 | 78 | 57 |
| #2 | aNxi. | +1.78 | 80 | 54 |
| #3 | KuTenis | +1.28 | 51 | 56 |
| #4 | danyooh | +1.12 | 47 | 55 |
| #5 | Mcdonald Glover | +0.77 | 52 | 59 |





