








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 170 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Esplay | 5 matches | 2,218 | |
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1366 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,022 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1724 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1084 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1135 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1079 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $240,632 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 46 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | HENU | 67% | 15 |
| #7 | mADR | 60% | 10 |
| #8 | Vilzs | 53% | 40 |
| #9 | Puukko-Allu | 38% | 8 |
| #10 | LRZ | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HENU | 2 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | hulkka[N! | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hulkka[N! | 75 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #2 | Vilzs | 46 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | gaslipstick | 35 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | LRZ | 33 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | toMi | 32 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HENU | +7.04 | 93 | 69 |
| #2 | gaslipstick | +2.50 | 89 | 87 |
| #3 | Vilzs | +2.29 | 88 | 52 |
| #4 | nexu | +1.47 | 85 | 71 |
| #5 | toMi | +0.87 | 72 | 68 |





