








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
419 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,270 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 322 | 25% |
| Smokes | 189 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 473 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 286 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $325,937 of utility $273 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 115 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | finger | 73% | 22 |
| #2 | jÄger | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | ZaERdna | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | -TRIFIXX | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | brate | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | jÄger | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | ZaERdna | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | -TRIFIXX | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | brate | 46% | 35 |
| #6 | Atte | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZaERdna | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | -TRIFIXX | 3 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | brate | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | finger | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brate | 197 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #2 | -TRIFIXX | 162 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #3 | ZaERdna | 72 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | finger | 59 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | jÄger | 28 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brate | +2.03 | 74 | 71 |
| #2 | finger | +1.99 | 60 | 69 |
| #3 | -TRIFIXX | +1.66 | 62 | 73 |
| #4 | ZaERdna | +1.55 | 74 | 66 |
| #5 | Atte | +1.44 | 80 | 60 |





