








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 77 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 127 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1857 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,368 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 851 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1169 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1292 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1056 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $755,164 of utility $232 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dadofthreenerds | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | wINTHER-_ | 39% | 31 |
| #3 | Pollemiz | 32% | 19 |
| #4 | zavage | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dadofthreenerds | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | wINTHER-_ | 39% | 31 |
| #3 | Pollemiz | 32% | 19 |
| #4 | zavage | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wINTHER-_ | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wINTHER-_ | 84 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | dadofthreenerds | 65 | 0.29 | 1 min |
| #3 | Pollemiz | 40 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | zavage | 24 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dadofthreenerds | +2.01 | 75 | 81 |
| #2 | wINTHER-_ | -0.04 | 53 | 67 |
| #3 | AikA | -0.13 | 54 | 64 |
| #4 | Pollemiz | -1.41 | 59 | 72 |
| #5 | zavage | -1.98 | 54 | 81 |





