








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1118 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 591 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5575 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,641 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11642 | 32% |
| Smokes | 10880 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 8103 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6016 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $849,711 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 684 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaSSeHbAbY | 66% | 248 |
| #2 | laUDUST🥵🥵🥵🥵 | 66% | 67 |
| #3 | BarberMaskinen | 57% | 46 |
| #4 | 5oftb0i | 47% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaSSeHbAbY | 66% | 248 |
| #2 | laUDUST🥵🥵🥵🥵 | 66% | 67 |
| #3 | BarberMaskinen | 57% | 46 |
| #4 | 5oftb0i | 47% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaSSeHbAbY | 3 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaSSeHbAbY | 419 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #2 | laUDUST🥵🥵🥵🥵 | 144 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | 5oftb0i | 91 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | BarberMaskinen | 83 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaSSeHbAbY | +1.32 | 79 | 50 |
| #2 | dadofthreenerds | +1.18 | 73 | 84 |
| #3 | BarberMaskinen | +1.02 | 69 | 66 |
| #4 | laUDUST🥵🥵🥵🥵 | -0.48 | 55 | 50 |
| #5 | 5oftb0i | -0.59 | 44 | 60 |





