








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 176 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Wingman | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1896 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,283 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2133 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2072 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1866 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2212 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $353,854 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gottzera | 70% | 44 |
| #2 | BOOGEY | 68% | 19 |
| #3 | Benthien | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | FakeFox | 55% | 92 |
| #5 | sapo | 53% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FakeFox | 16 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Pepino | 9 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | ehzo | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | sapo | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | xerim | 3 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FakeFox | 627 | 0.34 | 18 min |
| #2 | Pepino | 411 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #3 | ehzo | 275 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | sapo | 260 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | xitaozinho | 101 | 0.19 | 2 min |





