








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2100 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,482 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1849 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1792 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1479 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1362 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $805,596 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Jepugga | 50% | 118 |
| #10 | nata | 49% | 85 |
| #11 | xtimux | 47% | 19 |
| #12 | Saunamies80 | 47% | 17 |
| #13 | Syötti123 | 46% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jepugga | 11 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Nepo | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Syötti123 | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | nata | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | compl1cated [ C ] ??? | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nepo | 411 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | Jepugga | 408 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #3 | compl1cated [ C ] ??? | 240 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #4 | Syötti123 | 192 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | nata | 173 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nepo | +2.55 | 84 | 69 |
| #2 | compl1cated [ C ] ??? | +1.66 | 81 | 74 |
| #3 | nata | +1.65 | 66 | 60 |
| #4 | vAALtsu | +1.09 | 84 | 74 |
| #5 | Jepugga | +0.68 | 72 | 69 |





