








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 81 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 105 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1830 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,534 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 412 | 16% |
| Smokes | 793 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 139 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 1190 | 47% |
Our logs show you have wasted $266,080 of utility $29 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | hergs | 55% | 175 |
| #6 | erik :] | 53% | 51 |
| #7 | walt wertzel | 47% | 110 |
| #8 | GamerGirlFart | 45% | 31 |
| #9 | zuggie24 | 36% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dash | 17 | 0.0183 |
| #2 | hergs | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | walt wertzel | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | lulzxdd | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | erik :] | 3 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dash | 255 | 0.27 | 7 min |
| #2 | lulzxdd | 115 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | sluth | 80 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | erik :] | 75 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | hergs | 57 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dash | +7.71 | 87 | 74 |
| #2 | lulzxdd | +5.59 | 74 | 52 |
| #3 | erik :] | +2.89 | 75 | 57 |
| #4 | hergs | +1.59 | 19 | 20 |
| #5 | sluth | +1.54 | 56 | 49 |





