








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 153 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 148 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2063 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,556 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1305 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1947 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1954 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1350 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $711,482 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deku | 64% | 56 |
| #2 | booris | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | hiskihidodd | 60% | 99 |
| #4 | Proto | 58% | 48 |
| #5 | mape | 57% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Jello | 54% | 37 |
| #7 | spypas3 | 54% | 99 |
| #8 | Mahmoud | 50% | 52 |
| #9 | Roccaw | 48% | 21 |
| #10 | aleK | 44% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deku | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | hiskihidodd | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | booris | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | aleK | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Proto | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hiskihidodd | 358 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | spypas3 | 219 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Deku | 137 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mahmoud | 120 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Proto | 89 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mape | +3.71 | 86 | 62 |
| #2 | Deku | +2.64 | 84 | 67 |
| #3 | hiskihidodd | +1.17 | 60 | 74 |
| #4 | Proto | +0.92 | 79 | 57 |
| #5 | RailiMummo | +0.74 | 70 | 58 |





