








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 606 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 236 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 195 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4465 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,313 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3700 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4522 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4123 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3968 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,354,352 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1303 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kenny Hess | 65% | 91 |
| #2 | V1peR | 60% | 104 |
| #3 | Echo! | 56% | 185 |
| #4 | taek | 55% | 260 |
| #5 | meow | 51% | 187 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | V1peR | 60% | 104 |
| #3 | Echo! | 56% | 185 |
| #4 | taek | 55% | 260 |
| #5 | meow | 51% | 187 |
| #6 | boyboy | 48% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | V1peR | 13 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | meow | 12 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Echo! | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | taek | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | boyboy | 2 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | taek | 651 | 0.13 | 19 min |
| #2 | Echo! | 618 | 0.16 | 18 min |
| #3 | V1peR | 501 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #4 | Kenny Hess | 209 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | meow | 178 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | V1peR | +2.97 | 81 | 71 |
| #2 | boyboy | +2.20 | 96 | 53 |
| #3 | taek | +2.12 | 91 | 63 |
| #4 | Echo! | +1.67 | 81 | 63 |
| #5 | moki | +0.41 | 71 | 65 |





