








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 576 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1984 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,195 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1414 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1628 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1277 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 876 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $853,045 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 252 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Certified Driving Forklift | 63% | 54 |
| #2 | John CS | 60% | 30 |
| #3 | TjackMessias | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | vatodjyllto | 56% | 64 |
| #5 | MalluGuld | 54% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | HeadshotHäxan | 48% | 93 |
| #8 | Cröppler | 48% | 50 |
| #9 | Ryan Gravenberch | 48% | 69 |
| #10 | ShadowSigge09 | 47% | 129 |
| #11 | LEONARDO<3 | 45% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cröppler | 18 | 0.0171 |
| #2 | LEONARDO<3 | 14 | 0.0105 |
| #3 | MalluGuld | 13 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | Certified Driving Forklift | 12 | 0.0110 |
| #5 | HeadshotHäxan | 11 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShadowSigge09 | 360 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | Ryan Gravenberch | 208 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | LEONARDO<3 | 201 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | HeadshotHäxan | 132 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Sum Ting Wong | 128 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Certified Driving Forklift | +2.42 | 61 | 54 |
| #2 | HeadshotHäxan | +1.67 | 88 | 38 |
| #3 | ShadowSigge09 | +1.61 | 68 | 62 |
| #4 | Viggo2009 | +1.13 | 58 | 50 |
| #5 | Ryan Gravenberch | -0.17 | 79 | 63 |





