








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1514 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,156 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 945 | 30% |
| Smokes | 847 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 662 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 702 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $292,015 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CheeseBall | 93% | 14 |
| #2 | Roidrage10 | 67% | 27 |
| #3 | TheLaw11 | 65% | 60 |
| #4 | Kilo | 63% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CheeseBall | 93% | 14 |
| #2 | Roidrage10 | 67% | 27 |
| #3 | TheLaw11 | 65% | 60 |
| #4 | Kilo | 63% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kilo | 14 | 0.0132 |
| #2 | TheLaw11 | 6 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Roidrage10 | 3 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kilo | 57 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Roidrage10 | 49 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | TheLaw11 | 40 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | CheeseBall | 29 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CheeseBall | +2.70 | 85 | 49 |
| #2 | Kilo | +2.30 | 55 | 26 |
| #3 | Roidrage10 | +1.21 | 60 | 51 |
| #4 | Peaches | +0.98 | 78 | 47 |
| #5 | TheLaw11 | -1.89 | 29 | 18 |





