








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 60 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




88 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5318 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,233 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5568 | 42% |
| Smokes | 3475 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1693 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 2497 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,420,740 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 659 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. G | 54% | 537 |
| #2 | < blank > | 53% | 355 |
| #3 | realDuckHunterOG2003 | 50% | 38 |
| #4 | minato | 50% | 213 |
| #5 | i_like_pudding492 | 49% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. G | 87 | 0.0081 |
| #2 | < blank > | 69 | 0.0099 |
| #3 | minato | 45 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | She Like The Way That I Woo | 13 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | King Jeremy the 1st | 10 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. G | 1143 | 0.11 | 31 min |
| #2 | < blank > | 573 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #3 | She Like The Way That I Woo | 243 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | i_like_pudding492 | 133 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | King Jeremy the 1st | 113 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. G | +5.70 | 67 | 62 |
| #2 | King Jeremy the 1st | +3.69 | 63 | 43 |
| #3 | i_like_pudding492 | +3.40 | 71 | 40 |
| #4 | realDuckHunterOG2003 | +1.63 | 57 | 28 |
| #5 | FUTURE AI VOICE | +0.61 | 63 | 43 |





