








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 189 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,673 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1347 | 29% |
| Smokes | 747 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1338 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1241 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $581,057 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | yab!sh | 47% | 15 |
| #6 | moranGOD | 47% | 73 |
| #7 | yaB!sh | 46% | 67 |
| #8 | gETÚLIO nARGAS | 45% | 22 |
| #9 | LEDUR | 42% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | x1naida | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | yaB!sh | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | AeroSCHMITZ | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | moranGOD | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | LEDUR | 3 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | x1naida | 494 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #2 | AeroSCHMITZ | 449 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #3 | yaB!sh | 359 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #4 | moranGOD | 215 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | LEDUR | 139 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gETÚLIO nARGAS | +3.34 | 69 | 64 |
| #2 | AeroSCHMITZ | +3.12 | 73 | 73 |
| #3 | x1naida | +2.94 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | LEDUR | +1.95 | 71 | 61 |
| #5 | yaB!sh | +0.66 | 82 | 78 |





